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Kane's music hits. The pyros go off. The Undertaker jumps the barrier. A Royal Rumble 2026 fiction piece that got out of hand.

Hooks For Hands IV: Celeb MasterChef, a ruined Bobotie and Gran phoning from Uncle Phil's to watch Strictly.

A TikTok trend, a hook shortage, questions in Parliament, and one spokesman doing his best not to mention he might not have hands anymore.

A reader from Iraq, a romantic poem gone wrong, and a business idea to rival Lock, Stock's mail order dildo plan. Grindr, watch your back.

A poem about a man with hooks for hands. The challenges are numerous, the solutions are limited, the rhymes are impeccable.

Rey Mysterio has defeated the Big Show. He's much smaller though. A wrestling haiku. Part of a series.

Hunter Hearst Helmsley married Stephanie McMahon. Observations follow. A wrestling haiku. Part of a series.

A wrestling haiku about Lita. Written under difficult conditions. Syllabically correct. Part of a series.

Bianca Belair's hair. A haiku. A request. Part of a series.

A haiku about professional wrestling. Grappling with the eternal questions, in the prescribed syllabic format.

A one-haiku tribute to Charlotte Flair. Heartfelt, anatomically specific, and almost certainly not reciprocated. Wrestling poetry at its most sincere.

A wrestling haiku in praise of Stone Cold Steve Austin's rear end. That's the bottom line. Part of a series.

A haiku about the wrestler Haku, for no good reason. The first in a series of wrestling haiku.