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Poetry

Form

Short comic poems and verse

Status

Five poems, 6 April 2023 to 14 December 2023

Reading time

About 5 minutes (1 minute each)

Content note

Strong language, sexual and bodily humour, and references to bowel cancer and Jewish identity.

1

Bowel Cancer Brown

2

Margarine Marjorie

3

He had a Jewish nose

4

Each time i go for a piss

5

Wrestling Haiku 4

Five short poems about people who probably didn't ask to be immortalised in verse, plus a spider with very little patience. There is a man whose hair inspires an entire bowel-cancer nickname, a Marjorie taking over town, and a Black Crowes pun with a nose at its centre. A bathroom visit prompts two lines of arachnid abuse. Then a wrestling haiku argues, in the correct number of syllables, that it is about time Bubba got the tables. Comic, crude and occasionally alarmingly brief.

A fed-up red-haired bearded man in a T-shirt sitting on a toilet with his jeans down, holding a toilet roll and resting his head on his hand.

An older woman in a yellow floral dress and sun hat striding down a town high street with chickens around her, past a chalkboard reading Margarine Marjorie, all about town.

Two black crows perched on a mossy wooden fence post under a stormy sky, with fields in the distance.

A small spider on a white bathroom basin beside a chrome tap, a toothbrush pot and a folded towel.

Two muscular wrestlers in camouflage gear pose in a wrestling ring beside a folding table, with a brightly lit arena crowd behind them. Illustrated in a comic-book style.