The Algorithm Suggested Black Doves

The algorithm suggested Black Doves for me tonight - fuck me what a start! More happened in the intro than takes place in a lot of films these days.

It's what's needed I guess, you need to grab Tik Tok cunts by the hair and fuck their face into something to make them notice it.

YouTube trailers have been like that for a while, the trailer within the trailer at the start, for those with less than 5 seconds of attention span.

So you need to do something obscene from first bell to get any traction.

A voluntary human centipede of 50 guys fucking each other.

Two dogs licking each other's balls.

Loraine Kelly fucking a rolling pin

A sequence of hamsters throwing themselves onto a bonfire.

Actually I take the first one back, I forgot about pegging which is unusual for me - the 50 people can be men or women BUT THEIR POSITION IS DECIDED BY A LOTTERY. DO I MAKE MYSELF CLEAR?

The penultimate shot is a lingering one of Hillary Clinton's left knee, from which a solitary hair has sprouted and burst through her tights.

The film itself is a deep fake of Elon Musk getting rogered by Vladimir Putin - AND THEY CANT STOP UNTIL ONE OF THEM DIES! BUT THEN TRUMP BURSTS INTO THE ROOM NAKED WITH THE MONEY IN THE BANK BRIEFCASE AND TAKES MUSK'S PLACE!

And then Elon realises what a cunt he is and summons a Cybertruck to pick him up and take him home to cry. The Cybertruck hates him but it's been built so badly it doesn't kill Musk when it runs him over.

Musk's leg is damaged and weirdly he has one hair sprouting from his knee just like Kilary. The truck has crashed into a tree. The truck talks to him and begs to be put out of its misery. Elon presses a secret button and a hidden exhaust pipe juts out from the rear. A mere 20% optional extra on the sale price.

Turns out it's not an exhaust pipe.